[ When his arms close around her, she starts to fight them at first, mistaking him for that creature in the dark, and the tears come then. An ugly mess of them that she cannot put words to, and with them, a howling sound that is barely human. She does not want this. She has never wanted this.
She realizes that the steady embrace around her is Ben's and she stops — fighting him. Nails and fists let up on his shoulders and instead slip around them, pulling herself trembling into his arms. Rey has never had an easy time sleeping, never found respite in the dark, always dreamed of something distant and foreign to her in hopes that she'll see it someday, but —
This is worse. Worse than all her grief and loneliness and pain. It's as though all of it, a lifetime of it, has become concentrated. And it's set on drowning her.
You're not alone, he tells her, and the sobbing gets worse. She doesn't know what to do with this. He should not even be here, comforting her. She's nothing to him. Nobody. But she's so, so glad that he is. ]
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She realizes that the steady embrace around her is Ben's and she stops — fighting him. Nails and fists let up on his shoulders and instead slip around them, pulling herself trembling into his arms. Rey has never had an easy time sleeping, never found respite in the dark, always dreamed of something distant and foreign to her in hopes that she'll see it someday, but —
This is worse. Worse than all her grief and loneliness and pain. It's as though all of it, a lifetime of it, has become concentrated. And it's set on drowning her.
You're not alone, he tells her, and the sobbing gets worse. She doesn't know what to do with this. He should not even be here, comforting her. She's nothing to him. Nobody. But she's so, so glad that he is. ]